Well today is sunday, which means I get to weigh in, and we get our super team work out. Yay? lol I have to admit, I feel soooo guilty for not working out yesterday. The reason I didn't was because I was told not to. That's right, TOLD not to... Leo says that we can actually over-train, so our bodies need time to recouperate. Well even though I was told not to, and really LOVED sleeping in, I feel guilty for it. I feel like when I get weighed in today, that my results won't be what I want, because I didn't work out yesterday. Why do I do this to myself?? Why do I blame myself for such ridiculous things? Honestly! I just don't understand myself.
On top of all of the guilt, I have pain. oh yes, I have pain. And not the kind of "ouchie my muscles hurt" kind of pain, because I'd welcome that. From all this lovely high fibre food such as brocolli, carrots, all bran, rye bread, whole wheat pasta, rice, etc... I have developed the most debilitating case of GAS PAIN!! It is so embarassing because now I'm Super-Flatulent Gas-Powered Work-out Woman!! I'm my own frigging super hero, with the ability to fly with air coming out my butt. Super. But I could handle being air-borne if it wasn't for the pain. That upper abdominal cramping that makes you feel like your stomach is sticking way out past your toes, and all you want to do is curl up into a ball and die. Yeah that's the pain. So, I ended up having to hit the grocery store and buy some Gas-X. Let me tell you, I was wayyyy more embarassed about that than I thought I would be. It was kind of mixed in with the rest of the groceries we had to purchase, so it wasn't sooo bad, but it was bad enough. I think I was more humiliated buying Gas-X, than any other item. I think I'd even rather buy Monistat than the Gas-X. It's like "yes I feminine troubles, but heaven forbid I have flatulence!" It reminds me of a line I heard a long time ago on the comedy network. "As women we don't snore, belch or pass wind; if we didn't bitch we'd explode!" lol I love that line.
Anyway enough about my personal methane factory, let's get back to the weight issue. Because I want to beat it to death before it's all gone! I admit I have still been checking my weight, and was happy yesterday to see that I had now lost 6.5 lbs, but when I checked my weight this morning, I was disappointed to see that I hadn't lost anymore. And I've been weighing myself prior to eating, so now I've had a huge breakfast and that's going to make it worse. Even though I'm only a week in, I feel like I should be doing better, which is silly of course, but I want so badly this time to succeed. I don't want to go through all this pain and frustration, all this routine changing sweating and burning to only lose a few pounds. I'm killing myself at the gym everyday, trying to push myself to the limit and then go to work afterwards, therefore I feel like the weight should be pouring off. Which is also silly, because 5-6 lbs in one week is amazing. I know this, you know this. Normal weight loss is 1-2 lbs a week, so 5-6 lbs is incredible. I think for some reason I just want to be the best. I can't be the best at much of anything, in fact not really anything, but I have the weight to lose and the ambition to do it, so I don't just want to lose the weight, I want to WIN. God I must sound crazy. Am I crazy?? Am I taking this weight loss thing too far or am I just getting myself down?
Hey Jackie! You're doing awesome! No reason to beat yourself up. And remember that your scale is different from their scale so you never know :)
ReplyDeleteAnd a note for the people out there that want to exercise but cite money as a reason for not going to a gym. I lost 4 pounds this week by taking the insurance off my car. Yes'm. Not only did I lose some weight, but I SAVED money. So suck up your excuses and get motivated. If you can do 1/2 as good as Jackie you're AWESOME :D
I'm excited to keep reading about this Jackie. You should update with pictures! Even headless ones :D